Permission Granted (Not That You Need It)

Read Time: 3 minutes

I’ve been thinking about jerks a lot lately.

Let me explain.

It started with me doing some intense soul searching.

I’ve been pouring my heart and soul into this company because I want to make a different in the world.

I hear the questions, I see the doubts, and I feel the stress that international students carry with them.

What bothers me the most: a lot of these questions and insecurities are things that I can answer and help resolve.

Not everything, of course. There are certainly unknowns. But I can at least provide options, perspectives, and informed choices.

Now, where do jerks come into play?

Well, all the time & effort I’ve been putting into this has meant that I’ve pulled time, effort, & attention away from other things. Or people.

I don’t text my brother as much as I used to.

I’m distracted more often when I’m with my wife & kids.

And my patience, which normally is pretty decent, has gotten a bit shorter as I’ve been getting less sleep lately.

So, I had to ask myself, am I a jerk?

I kid you not, as I was asking myself this question while driving down the road, I found myself smiling and waving to the crossing guard by my son’s daycare.

I had to laugh.

Here I was, asking myself if I was a jerk.

As I was giving a warm smile to a complete stranger.

For no other reason than to be kind to someone who’s out there working to keep others safe.

And then it hit me.

Jerks don’t worry about being jerks.

It’s the good, kind people who worry if they’re a jerk.

And maybe that’s you.

Maybe this American Dream of yours makes you feel a little guilty.

Maybe you feel like you’d be selfish to chase your American Dream. To leave your family and move to the other side of the world.

Let me tell you.

From someone who’s worked with thousands of international students…

Nothing could be further from the truth.

We have our dreams for a reason.

As Ed Mylett says, “God did not put these dreams in your heart as a joke.”

Even though you would be the one coming to the U.S., countless other people will benefit from your brave choice.

Your family, present or future, will benefit in the long run.

The people you meet in school will benefit from getting to know someone from a different culture- in fact, this is how many Americans learn about other cultures! (We don’t travel on holiday as much as the Europeans to haha.)

And I’m not exaggerating when I say that the United States benefits from you coming here to study.

Yes, the country does. It benefits from you.

Because international students are disproportionately keeping the American Dream alive.

Sadly, the U.S. has gotten into a cynical collective mindset these last several years as our politics has gotten more divisive.

But international students are still able to appreciate our freedoms, our privileges, and our opportunities.

And the rest of us that are fortunate to be around international students benefit from getting that refreshed outlook.

So no, wanting to come to the U.S. does not make you a jerk.

It makes you a part of something bigger than yourself.

And besides…

If you were really selfish, you wouldn’t even have these concerns.

You wouldn’t need to convince yourself.

Give yourself credit for you intentions.

You’re a kind, thoughtful person.

Leaving your home is tough.

But if it’s on your heart, you owe it to yourself, to your present & future family, and to everyone you’d meet along the way, to chase that dream and chase it fully.

So go forth and…

Live Your American Dream.

Josh